“I hate my mother-in-law…”
Well, that’s what I used to say till some type of Alzheimers set in making her quite the happy, forget-what-daughter-in-law-did-wrong-now, person.
But if all girls want to spend time with their own Moms, when do the Husband Mom’s win?
Course this topic never concerned me…..till two of my three kids came out as BOYS. Suddenly I’m concerned. Now, I know it’s not fair that that most husbands blow off their own Mom just to make wifey-poo happy. It’s smart for the marriage, but not fair to the ‘boys’ Mom who endured years of hell raising that kid for him to just….leave her?
Now I”m thinking about my own boys…..as grown-ups, where will they spend their holidays? With the girlfriend? The wife? Will they even invite me over when that first grandbaby is born? Will they call? Write? Text? Will I even know?
I have a girlfriend who spends every single summer with her Mother-in-law. Often times without her husband (M-I-L’s son)! Why? M-I-L has a summer home on a lake!!!
Where do her boys beg to go every summer? The lake! To see Grandma on Dad’s side!
Grandma years for me may be a long way off….but not the plan to get something in place that future grandkids will want to visit!
I chuckled as I attempted to brainwash my youngest last weekend. I rubbed his temples and spoke that slow scary deep cadence, “When you grow up and move out, you will call and visit me…”
Visibly laughing my five year old boy crawled away from me and pointed to his temple, “If I don’t, you’ll always be in here.”
My mouth dropped. Maybe it’s hopeless work against built-in man-genetics?
Just then the phone rang. My M-I-L wanted to know if we could come to her house for Christmas this year.
I paused. Gave it two seconds of deep constructive thought and said, “My mom already asked us this year…maybe you all could come to their house too?”
It wasn’t the Christmas I imagined but how could I expect my boys to remember to invite me when I didn’t invite ‘her?’
….I guess if I’m lucky I’ll be dead before all the chaos.